Let's Think About It Podcast

Episode 71: Leading the New You with S.W.A.G.

• Morice Mabry • Season 3 • Episode 71

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Episode Summary

Leaders don’t get stuck for lack of talent. They get stuck inside an old identity. In this episode, Coach Mo and Coach A-Mo unpack how environment, habits, and memory lock us into the “chicken yard” when we’re built to fly. Using the S.W.A.G. Framework—Self-Awareness, Why-Power, Aligned Action, and Grit—they show how to move from autopilot to intention, from external validation to inner vision, and from proof-seeking to faith-driven progress. You’ll learn why shifting leadership habits is hard, how the punk-ass inner critic disguises itself as comfort, and what it takes to build mental, emotional, and spiritual resilience while you rewire who you are becoming. If you’re at the crossroad between comfort and calling, this conversation gives you a practical cycle to remember—then embody—the leader you were meant to be.

Key Takeaways

  • Environment writes identity: If you stay in the chicken yard, you’ll peck like one. Change the room to change the role.
  • The S.W.A.G. cycle works: Self-Awareness → Why-Power → Aligned Action → Grit. Then repeat.
  • Faith before evidence: Unseen progress still counts; belief leads behavior, then results.
  • Vision beats memory: You can’t build a new self with evidence from the old one.
  • Grit fuels return: When the inner critic pulls you back, grit restores awareness and action.
SPEAKER_01:

Welcome to the Luxe of Ballet Human Channel. We're highly achieving stuff performing and stomach transforming. I'm coaching out of my core energy leadership coach. I'm the money in the women and creator and swam. And turn touching into purpose. Subscribe to the channel and join me on YouTube at Swan Coaching. So let's get your reps in. Welcome to another episode of the Let's Think About It podcast. I'm your host, Coach Mo. And I'm here with my co-host, Algie Mosley, aka Coach A Mo. Welcome, brother.

SPEAKER_02:

Imagine that, Coach Mo. It's KO A Mo right behind you. You know what's good. What's good for today is I really, what's on your mind? What do you want to talk about, Coach Mo?

SPEAKER_01:

Brother, I just have this thought that I want us to really think about. Because that's what this is about. Let's think about it. Leaders, people, high achievers struggle with converging the old you into the new you. And I want to get into that a little bit. How do we build resilience and shifting our old paradigm to a new paradigm? Shifting the old habits to a new habit that we want to create for ourselves. How do we shift old leadership habits, leading self-habits into this new version of what we want to be? How do we do that? That's what I want to explore today. Because we have, we carry so many habits that we can't rid ourselves of. And we don't know why. And we just show up in this autopilot state of being filling us, we have no choice, and we have to stay here. We have to continue to be this old version of me that I no longer want to be and struggle to shift to the new me.

SPEAKER_02:

That question challenges people to reimagine themselves beyond their current situations and beyond their current habits, perceives limitations, right? It's not about who you've been, but who you're becoming, even when there's no proof that the transformation is possible. So that transformation, Mo is it all reminds me of the chicken and the eagle story. I don't know if you've ever heard that one, but it's one I used to tell my employees about the chicken and the eagle story because it was important for them to understand who they are. Okay, not what they've been programmed. And part of that was the there was this the chickens were playing chicken football. You with me, Coach Mo? And playing chicken football, and they were all like 41 minutes of the cue. And the mother hand came out and she looked out and she said, Seeing the chickens out there having such a good time. She was so happy and her heart started to glow. And she was like, Yes, my babies. And then she took another look and her heart just sank. And she ran out there and said, No, this isn't a football. This is an egg. And she took the egg from the chickens and she took him, took the egg and put it in with the rest of the eggs in the barn. And as she was sitting there, they began to hatch. And one by one, they were yellow and they were fluffy, and she was so excited seeing her babies come out. And then one hatched Coach Mo. And it wasn't yellow, it wasn't fluffy, it was dark, long, black, and slimy. And even the mom looked at it and went, ooh. She said, That's my baby. That's my baby. And she went over and she cleaned him up, and all the other chickens, and they started eating out of the trough and eating that feed, but he was different, Mo. He wasn't like all the other chickens. And he tried to fit in, right? He went over and started plucking at the feed, and but his beak had a curl to it, so he couldn't really get much feed. He plucked, he could only get one kernel at a time. Well, all the other chickens were eating up all the food. And so he became a little malnutrition. He was different, and so they started teasing him. And he just didn't fit in, Mo. He was different, right? And so he didn't hang out with the other chickens. And then one day on the barnyard, the mother hen came and seen this shadow come over the barnyard. And she said, Run to the barn, run to the barn. And all the chickens started running to the barn, and they were running, and she was counting them. One, two, three, four, because she loved her babies. And the one she saw him out in the distance, and he was struggling because he didn't have much energy. And he was trying to run, but a big black shadow landed in front of him. And he started shaking. And a deep voice came out and said, What's wrong with you? And he says, I'm scared. I'm scared. And he says, Scared? What are you scared of? And he says, You're gonna eat me. And he says, Eat you? Do you know who you are? And he says, A chicken. Right? And he said, A chicken. Hold your hand out here. And he's no. And he said, if you don't hold it, I'll swallow you right now. And he held his hand out and he's shaking. And he says, squeeze. And he squaes. And he says, squeeze harder. And then click. These claws came out. He'd never seen them before. Whoa. His friends didn't have them. And he says, Hold your other hand out here. And he says, squeeze and click. And he says, You see those claws? That's not meant for scampering here on the ground playing chicken football. That's meant for hanging on a cliff. That beak you have that has a curl in it. That's not meant for picking up feed. That's meant for tearing the belly of a fish. Come with me. And he spread his wings and he says, Fly. You're an eagle, not a chicken. From his mindset, from the people he hung out with on that barnyard, he never knew he had claws. He never knew he could fly. He never knew a possibility. Like when you imagine a new version of yourself, you're like projecting a vision of identity, right? Like it's not just your goals or achievements, it's who you are.

SPEAKER_01:

I love that, bro. I truly love that story. And here's what's resonating with me from that story. Number one, the environment. And he was this eagle was raised amongst chickens, right? So he had the vision of himself as being a chicken because that's what the environment dictated. That's correct. And you naturally adapt into the environment that you're a part of. That's what that's what you know in this realm of being that environment. In that case, he's in the realm of being a chicken. He did not know what those possibilities are because all he knows is being a chicken. And it took this outer force, this outer experience of I don't know what it was that was flying this shadow that was coming to attack him, some other prey, whatever. But it took that being to give him awareness that you have possibilities, right? That's correct. And that's why I want to tap into this today, right? Because whether you're talking leadership, being a high achiever, whatever version of yourself, it has no point, right? It does have a point. Become a true victim of our environment. We develop these habits of this version of self that we believe to be true. Our paradigm is shaped in that version through these ongoing habits that we are often afraid to shift and change. And that becomes our identity of who we are. Even if we don't feel we want to be that identity, we feel that we have no choice but to be that identity. And so we go through these patterns, these habits that's naturally reinforced through our environments. Obviously, there's other things that contribute to that, but I'm just focusing on the environment. And because that environment could be the culture, your family, your friends, the school you go to, the place of employment, your marital status, even your health dictates that. And we live by that. And often some of us refuse to change that. And we hit that crossroad. And that crossroad is damn, I'm ready for something different. There's gotta be more.

SPEAKER_02:

If I'm a seed, how in the hell can I imagine ever being a tree?

SPEAKER_01:

Exactly. Same with being a chicken. Same thing. How can you ever imagine being an eagle? You've never seen an eagle. Let alone fly. Let alone fly. Actually, did he even know he had wings? I bet you the colonel did. So that's what I'm saying, brother. We go through life not knowing what we don't know. And it's this yearning, that why power that's really trying to come out. But yet we continue to suppress it because we don't know what that is. And we haven't been taught to trust the unseen, which is faith, right? The spirit within us. Right. And we haven't been taught to what that meaning is. And I think with spirituality, going to church and learning about the Bible, God, that's a great place to start and really identify with purpose and what Jesus went through and all of that, right? But you still have to apply it in self and have the confidence and the faith to listen to what the spirit is telling you. It's tough when you don't know what you don't know, and you have these feelings of wanting to be a different self, but your environment is dictating not to do that because you haven't seen it yet.

SPEAKER_02:

Trusting in an unseen progress is progress. And I think what you're trying to say, Mo, is that faith, right? That like trusting in the unseen progress, faith is blind, it's belief before evidence. Does that make sense? Yeah. And that you believe in the things that you cannot see. It's like the new version often already exists in a seed form, as we were talking, right? But you're not creating something from scratch, you're uncovering who you are beneath the layers of fear, conditioning, programming, and sometimes even survival habits. But Coach Munn will understand if I'm a seed, right? Or if I'm that chicken surrounded by other chickens, what is it gonna take for me to figure that out?

SPEAKER_01:

Does it take resilience or it does? It takes it takes a tremendous amount of resilience because at some point in our world, in our lives, we get this yearning of wanting more, right? Whatever, however that shows up, something is off, something sh just feels different. And that's the beginning process of the yearning for more. That's the why, the why power trying to creep in and create more awareness of your current being, your current state of being. That's what's happening, right? The resilience piece of it, grit, by the way.

SPEAKER_02:

Is that is it grit every time every time I that grit, it reminds me of swag, right? It is, man. I know you're about ready to get into grit, but can you break down swag one more time for me before you get into the grit?

SPEAKER_01:

Yeah, man, self-awareness, why power, aligned action, and grit. And there's just this process, right? There's this growth process that when you're in the cycle, right, of swag, you have this self-awareness that fuels wanting to know more about who I am, why, and what my purpose is. Understanding and trying to feel this yearning of what my purpose is, you naturally think, what actions do I need to take? How do I figure out what this purpose is? What do I need to do? You need to get a coach. Whatever. And so once you identify what those actions are, you start implementing them, right? But then as you're implementing these actions, there's a part of you that don't want to change. It's a part of you that wants you to flake out on yourself, wants you to just stop because it's uncomfortable. And that's the grit of what I'm talking about. That's the resilient piece of swag. So going back to what you asked me about how does the chicken like really know? And he has this yearning feeling that there's something bigger out there. But in your story, in that case, it happened to be this other predator that shows up, and that predator helped influence his awareness that there's more out there, right? That's that happens sometimes, right? But if that never happens to us, then we're in this space where no one, everybody in our environment is one way, and you have this yearning that there's a different way, but no one is giving you any instructions on how to be a different way, right? You naturally have this yearning for more. And some of us dismiss that yearning and say, you know what, have to be like everyone else. And they just dismiss it, regardless of knowing that there's more, they're afraid to experience more because how they think they would be judged if they go outside the environment. And so they stay, but then that the resilient piece of this, you continue to ask yourself, why do I feel this way? What does this mean? What's next for me? What steps do I gotta take? You know what? Shit, I don't care what anybody else thinks. I gotta experience this for myself, I gotta figure it out. There's just so much out there that I have yet to see, and I'm never gonna see it unless I try it. And that's the grit. That's the grit of not giving up on yourself and challenging how do I find this newer version of me because this old me isn't working for me right now. And what we find is that there's so many people right now, listening to this, leaning in is yeah, you're right, but I'm not gonna do anything. I'm good, I'm good. Because because what is my mom gonna think, or what is such and such gonna think? I I've been this way for 30 years. Who am I to change right now? And so then that whole feeling that you had, that it was inspirational. What you're saying, Mo, and then the swag just drizzled away, and you go back into your old reality that I can't be that it's comfortable, and then you remind yourself of all the old shit that you tried didn't work. So, what makes you think that changing myself after 30 years, 20 years, 10 years, it's gonna work now. I'm good, I'll stay where I'm at. It's comfortable, I'll deal with it. I dealt with it for 10 years. What's it doesn't matter, and that's exactly what I mean about that punk ass inner critic riding shotgun. That's exactly what I mean, brother.

SPEAKER_02:

But I hear what you're saying, Mo is you know, that punk ass critic can also be your habit, right? Trying to keep you comfortable, right? You don't want to try anything new, knowing that growth comes from the uncomfort, right? So it's like you're rewiring your identity while facing old evidence of who you've been. And that's gonna require quite a bit, like you were saying, it requires mental resilience, it requires emotional resilience, and it even requires spiritual resilience. The new self is forged in the friction between like who you were and who you were meant to be, right? And so that battle, believe it or not, reminds me of a trial I was going through. And God said, Go get that poem, go get that poem. And I was like, I didn't write poetry, I didn't, I don't write poetry, right? So I went to this book that I wrote scribbles because I love thoughts. So I wrote down thoughts, right? And then I tore this out and I tore that out and I tore this out and I put it all together, and it was like, whoa, it was crazy, Mo. It was like, I was like, God, you want me to quit my job? I just bought my first house, I just got my first child. How am I gonna survive? All these anxieties of went through me, right?

SPEAKER_01:

The logic thinking, that's natural, that's what we all experience.

SPEAKER_02:

And then when I put it all together, vision appeared. And I'm just gonna share vision real quick. But vision was what we're talking about, and that transformation and that chicken from that eagle that that turned into the eagle, and it goes like this. It's time to make a decision. Yet the future, I have no vision. It's just like what I've been told. This confusion called the crossroads. Door number one or door number two, bewildered, I just don't know what to do. I need some help. I need someone to say the footsteps I take will be okay. I'll travel backwards the road which I've come, but those things I've already done. Yes, it's time to make a decision, yet the future I have no vision. Troubling times, I must confess, for I feel like I'm stumbling through the valley of death. Now I know what I must do. I'll get on my knees and call on you. Like an eagle flying high in the sky. You seem to magnify my eyes. For it really doesn't matter, door number one or door number two, as long as my travels are not without you. Yes, it's time to make a decision. Thank you for the newfound vision. No debate on which road to take from stepping out on faith.

SPEAKER_01:

I like that. I like that. And what resonates with me from your poem there is vision. And I think where we struggle in shifting that version of old self to new self is that's just that the vision. Because, and this is just real talk, right? Because I experience it too, and all of the stuff that we're talking about. I'm not on a pedestal of anybody because I deal with this too. I work diligently to build awareness for myself so that I can continue to navigate to the version of mode that I want to be. And it's a continual building process for me. So I want everyone to know that I'm not on this pedal store dictating how you should change your version of self because I did. That's not where I'm coming from. I'm coming from a swag viewpoint, that self-awareness, why power, aligned action, and grit. And if we embrace that framework within self, you're taking incremental steps to be in that better version of you. And so going back to your poem, though, brother, vision really highlights this because let's just say, from a leadership standpoint and a leadership title standpoint, and you want to shift certain mannerisms, traits, and how you lead your team, right? What happens in that old version is you have this imagery, what we call memory, through our experiences of leading people, right? And somewhere down the line, we receive certain feedback that whether it's from our supervisor telling us we need to change and improve in this area, blah, blah, blah, right? Where it becomes really difficult to make that shift in our leadership roles, to embrace new habits, it's hard to visualize what that new version of leadership looks like. And we stay in the old habits because of our memory, because of our experiences. And that's the visual picture that we see. That's the habit that we continually reinforce because that's what we see. And your poem is really challenging us to get the vision so that when you come to that crossroad, you already know A or B. You already know, because you cultivated this vision of self, that you this future self that you already feel and know that's what you're gonna be. Because you've visualized it, and that's and at the core of it, bro, that's what we struggle at. That's why we stay where we are. Wow. Whether it's whether you're addicted to drugs, alcohol, abusive, it doesn't matter. Wow, it's hard to create that imagery, wow, our future self not doing those bad habits. That's right, and it's hard to cultivate the feeling of our future self. It's hard to do that. The old self and the memories behind it resonates those feelings that's right because it's your experience, that's what you know. Whether it's see, the habits, the bad habits, it's real comfortable because it feels good, and if I can do more of that, it masks my true identity of what I really want to be.

SPEAKER_02:

That's right.

SPEAKER_01:

So it comes comfortable to stay in that addictive reality. And I'm no scientist, I'm no neuroscientist, and understand the brain chemicals as it goes to the I'm not getting into all of that, I'm just speaking space based on wisdom and my own self-development, and just reading different professional books and things like that, and through my own personal experience. And I just know, Maurice Maybe, when I want to shift something, and sometimes it's hard as hell, because I'm comfortable, I know the feeling of the old way of being. And sometimes it's difficult to see what that new version is going to be. And when I do see it, it's difficult to cultivate the feeling of what that new being is. So I revert back to the old habits because that's what I know. That's right, that's what I've been. That's right. And the grit comes in is I'm consistently challenging myself. No, man, you're going back to the old habit. No, we can't do that. Let's be intentional right now. Okay, let's focus on what we really want to do. That's the grit. That's the grit. And then the reminder that, oh man, you falling back, me falling back, that's the self-awareness. That's the self-awareness part. The grit is fueling, actually fueling the self-awareness. Because in the moments, I recognize that I'm quitting, that I'm stagnant. And I'm like, no, we got to do more. We got to do more. I'm also funneling the action. That's right. Maybe, okay, we got to change it up. Let's change it up. Let's meditate this time. That's right. Let's just go meditate. All right. That's the aligned action. You know what? I'm not really feeling meditating. Man, let's just go for a walk. Let's go for the walk. And then when we go for a walk, I just downloaded this new podcast or this new audio book, and let's listen to that while we walk. Maybe that can refresh and reframe some things like that. It's the aligned action. But whatever it is, I'm in a cycle. That's right. Men of swag science. That's right. And the shit doesn't happen overnight, though, bro. Everything that we're talking about, it does not happen overnight. But it does take consciousness, awareness to start to move that needle. And why power? Why is all of this even important to you? And that's the power of choice that we have. That's right. And if you want to stay where you are, it's on you. Cool. Cool. Ain't nobody mad at you. It's your habit. You have to live with self.

SPEAKER_02:

Well, it reminds me what you're saying, and the depths of what you're saying is, and correct me if I'm wrong, but becoming who you're meant to be isn't about fixing who you are. It's about remembering who you were before the world told you to forget.

SPEAKER_01:

Can you repeat that? Because I don't think the audience really grabs that, bro.

SPEAKER_02:

I'm gonna back it up one more time. Becoming who you were meant to be isn't about fixing who you are, it's about remembering who you were before the world told you to forget. The new version of you doesn't wait for proof, right? It shows up through faith, it shows up through actions, and like you said, it shows up through resilience, right? Bottom line. You don't have to see the evidence before to believe it, right? The seed would never be a tree. So you just have to keep on walking like it's already yours, right? And I think that's the heartbeat of uh be it forward, becoming the example before the evidence, living today like the person your future has been waiting on a long time ago. So if you keep your vision strong and your spirit steady and your heart open, then that's what life is all about, Mo. And you learn to be it forward instead of being that silly rabbit stuck in those habits.

SPEAKER_01:

Before we get rid of this final, I need you to answer this for me, right? How do you help someone be it forward when they don't have the visual evidence of what be it forward will lead them to? How do you help a person in that regard?

SPEAKER_02:

Like you said, in that statement, one has to be conscious, you have to be aware, right? And sometimes life sends you signs. And if you have eyes to see and ears to hear, Mo, you will cater to those signs because the world is talking to you. And sometimes even nature will try to knock on that silly head, right? And it will keep reminding you you can stay, you can be who you are or who you decide to be, but it's not it's gonna keep on knocking. It's not gonna go away. 10 years will go down the road, 15 years, and that knock's gonna come right back. Are you who you say you are you in alignment?

SPEAKER_01:

I appreciate you, brother. And I think everything that we talked about today is just real talk, and it's seriously worth thinking about. And I think I dropped a lot of nuggets today. And more importantly, um, I was talking to a client yesterday, and we were talking about swag, the swag framework, and just around this conversation, how she wanted to shift certain a certain leadership habit, right? And what came up was like this is the power of how swag works. What came up was she felt guilt that she hadn't been able to overcome it yet. And I said, let's break this down. I said, think about it. You have the self-awareness to know that you were offline and you refocused on your purpose to why this particular leadership situation was really important to you. And so that would cause you to bring it up to me today in our meeting. And then the aligned action was to talk this through to get more clarity for yourself, and your resilience is showing as in a sense that you're not giving up. And I said to her, Shay, you got swag. What are you talking about? I said, You think there's a finish line into this? And she took a step back and she said, You know what? You're right. You're right, Mom. I said, Yeah. Hell yeah, I'm right. Hell yeah, you got swag. Because without it, you would have quit. You would have gave up. You would have gone into this old version of you. That's not you anymore. You're consistently challenging and raising the bar for your leadership capabilities. What's swag? And honestly, bro, I'm not making this up. She said, you know what, mom? I appreciate you so much in this framework because I have a visual of what I can connect it with. When you say swag, I can see that, I can feel what that is. And going through the framework of it with me, just like you just did again, you just reminded me, yes, I do have swag. And that's a good feeling. I feel really good. And thank you. Thank you, Mo. Honestly, bro, that's exactly the frame of how we ended our conversation. Wow.

SPEAKER_02:

You know what I mean? Swag. You know it's a cycle, and I hate to use this pun when you're aware of your grit. Awareness is the first part of it, and grit's the last. But when you're aware of your grit, that just tells you you're in a cycle.

SPEAKER_01:

You're in the cycle. Yeah, and if anybody wants to learn more about this framework of swag, just go to my website. You it's really simple, Maurice Mabry.com. Go there, you'll be on my home page, and then I have links there about the swag cheat sheet. You can get it there. And then there's more talk about the inner arena because the inner arena is where we actually we condition this in the arena. It's not about teaching leadership, it's about conditioning, leading ourselves. That's what it's about. And we use leadership very vaguely, but I use I utilize leadership, leading self first. And we condition that in the inner arena. And you can get all of that information on my website at MauriceMavery.com. Any last words before we sign out?

SPEAKER_02:

Coach Amo? Coach Mo. Like the chicken and the eagle. And how do you be it forward? You don't have to see the evidence to believe that it's coming. You just have to keep walking like it's already yours. And I believe that's how you be it forward.

SPEAKER_01:

That's right. Thank you. Thank you. That's another rep in the inner arena. You didn't just listen, you leveled up your swag. Self-awareness, why power, aligned action, and grid. If this hit home, share it, subscribe to the Let's Think About It podcast, and log in with me on YouTube at Swag Coaching. Until next time, stay aware, lead with your Y, click in the moment, and keep your grid stone.