Let's Think About It Podcast

Episode 66: Identity Crisis at Work? Reclaim It with S.W.A.G.

• Morice Mabry • Season 3 • Episode 66

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Summary

S.W.A.G.™ CHEAT SHEET

THE INNER ARENA

Identity isn’t a job title—it’s energy in motion. In this conversation, Coach Mo and co-host Algie Mosley unpack the “identity crisis” leaders face when titles, roles, or achievements become the measure of worth. Using the S.W.A.G.™ framework—Self-Awareness, Why-Power, Aligned Action, and Grit—they show how to silence the punk-ass inner critic, reset energy levels, and move from stagnation to momentum. Algie shares a powerful shift from self-doubt to “I am” confidence, plus a locker-room metaphor for leaders who need a real place to regroup and recalibrate. If you’re leading under pressure, battling impostor thoughts, or stuck in autopilot, this episode shows how to reclaim identity, raise your energy, and take aligned action that lasts.

Key Takeaways

  • Name the opponent: Spot how the inner critic disguises fear and stalls action in meetings, public speaking, and daily decisions.
  • Shift your state: Use energy levels awareness to move from catabolic reactions to creative, solution-oriented responses.
  • S.W.A.G.™ in practice: Reconnect to Why-Power, choose one aligned action, then reinforce with grit to rebuild momentum.
  • Locker room for leaders: Create a private space—the Inner Arena—to peel back masks, reset, and plan adjustments.
  • Identity > titles: Success is a chapter, not the whole book; identity comes from values and consistent aligned actions.

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SPEAKER_00:

Welcome to the Let's Think About It podcast, where we embark on a journey of thoughtfulness and personal growth. I'm your host, Coach Mo, and I'm here to guide you through thought-promoking discussions that will inspire you to unlock your full potential. In each episode, we'll explore a wide range of topics from self-discovery and mindfulness to goal setting and achieving success. Together, we'll challenge conventional thinking and dive deep into the realms of possibility. Whether you're looking to find clarity in your personal or professional life or seeking strategies to overcome obstacles, this podcast is your go-to source for entire conversations and practical advice to find a comfortable spot. Let's embark on this journey of self-improvement together. Remember, the power of transformation lies within you, and together we'll uncover the tools and insights you need to make it happen. So let's dive in. Welcome to another episode of the Let's Think About It podcast. I'm your host, Coach Mo, with my co-host, Algie Mosley. What's up, brother? Hey, what's up, Mo? How you doing today, brother? Man, I am feeling outstanding, great, wonderful, and happy. What about yourself?

SPEAKER_04:

I'm feeling all that in dense on brother. I woke up this morning, I was so excited. A new day, a new opportunity, right? And then I thought about oh, we're gonna be talking about some things today. And I got even more excited because reality was right in front of me around this topic. So as we talked about identity crisis, and we were talking, I think, this weekend as we moved into swag and energy. Mo, can you speak on that just a little bit and I'll tell you my experience? But my life has not been the same.

SPEAKER_00:

And that's a great subway into what we're gonna talk about around identity crisis because my swag concept like really helps you redefine that identity crisis that people might be experiencing. So just a reminder swag. The S is self-awareness, the W is Y power, the A is aligned action, and the G is grit. And so I created this framework so that when people are feeling doubtful, insecure about themselves, right? They don't have swag. There's no swag present in that moment. There's no self-awareness present because you're distracted by the fear, the doubt, the inner critic, these judgments, and you lose sight of what your purpose is in that moment. That's the why power. It's not there because you're distracted, inner critic.

SPEAKER_01:

You're distracted by that, right?

SPEAKER_00:

That's right. And then you're off base, so there's no action. You're stagnant, you're stagnant, and you're in this rat, and you sure in the hell do not have any grit. You might be complaining. Why, why me? Why me? Why this? So you're not taking any action to move forward, and you're just stagnant. So what you got to experience on Saturday in the inner arena, the inner arena is the locker room, right? So remember we played sports. For all you listeners out there, you play sports if you have, right? You know about the locker room. This locker room is this sacred, intimate space where you just share. You take off the armor and you just support it as a team. Whether you win or you lose, and you see it on Sports Center all the time, and after a win or after a loss, what that locker room looks like. If it's a win, they just rally around each other. If it's a loss, they're down together. But it's the locker room. And what I realized is as leaders, we don't have a locker room. There's no locker room, right? So we're out in the field working, doing what we do, not even just being the leader, a high achiever, doing what we do, but we don't have a locker room. So I created the inner arena, okay? And on Saturday, Algie and my good friend Tisha entered the inner arena, and it's all based on the swag framework. So I'm gonna pause there because this really is about self-identity crisis, right?

SPEAKER_04:

That's right.

SPEAKER_00:

So, how does this start to connect with the identity crisis that people might be facing and what you experienced going into the inner arena?

SPEAKER_04:

Going into that arena, Mo, first of all, I really didn't know what to expect. Prior to I did a little pre-work, and to me, it was like the typical kind of pre-work you do. You tell them, Am I feeling this way? Am I feeling and based on those situations and circumstances, and I had done many of those before in my work experience, right? Um, breaks, all these things. But when I went into the arena, it was so eye-opening because when I came out of that arena, brother, I came out equipped with things I never knew. I had been on this planet for quite some time, and I was aware, I tell you, many times into energy, right? But I really didn't understand there's levels to this. Yeah, yeah. I think, I feel, I believe, was my coach training, right? Which was some awesome stuff. But when you feel, so let me give you an example, Mo. I went out for lunch today, and they said it's gonna be about 15 minutes, and so I decided, okay, let me go outside and sit in this chair outside, the beautiful weather. And I went outside and I was sitting there waiting on them to get done with my lunch. I went outside and I was sitting in a chair, and there was this young lady down the way sitting in the chair, and she had her phone on loud where you could hear her conversation, and you could hear her mother telling her, you need to do this, and you need to do that, and you need to do this.

SPEAKER_02:

And to me, it was I cringed, I cringed, it was all level one and two thought processes. She couldn't see outside or any other possibility other than what she was telling this young lady. And I'm like, whoa, I just cringed. And I'm like, if only the young lady knew, if only she was aware of the information and the way it was coming out was so toxic. And what's level one and level two?

SPEAKER_04:

Level one is and level two is catabolic, yeah, catabolic energy, and then there's level three, four, five, six, and seven, which I call heaven. And those are what they call anabolic energy, anabolic, yep. And understanding that concept, uh man, all my work, I went to work. I print out anabolic, put it all on my wall around me.

SPEAKER_00:

So if you want to hang out with me, you need to know you are right, and it goes back to the self-identity thing, though, right? Because more often than not, we're on autopilot. You don't know what you don't know, and you're brought up a certain way, you have certain beliefs, you see the world a certain way, and you're just in that, right? And then you don't understand why you're not progressing or why this or why that. That's also considered an identity crisis, right? And I think what you're basically saying is not that you had a critical identity crisis, but it still opened your eyes to levels of energy that you were unaware of. And take us through what's new about that new information that you have around energy for yourself.

SPEAKER_04:

Well, the first part of it, just like understanding who you are, it's self-awareness. I'm aware of my energy. I get to understand what level of energy I'm operating on, and understanding also my set, right? Like, am I level three type of person, and I normally will act and behave in this type of format, which is really good. But then as a level three, my next set of shoes is a level six. So whenever a problem comes to me, I automatically kick in innovative, creative. I look for ideas outside of the norm. And I was like, Man, that's me.

SPEAKER_02:

That's my identity. Oh my god. I used to be a three, now I'm a six. Now I'm gonna transcend and make up this mix. So it was, man.

SPEAKER_04:

And you know what it reminds me, Mo? It reminds me of a uh yeah, of a poem I wrote one time. It reminds me that we're more than titles as we search for our identity, right? So often people anchor their identity and what they do instead of who they are, or there's their titles, their roles, or their achievements. But what happens when all that's swept away? Who are you at that point in time? I think about Michael Jordan, right? And all the glamour and everything. And what happens when all of that's swept away? Who is he really? And his own identity. And it reminds me of this poem, and it goes like this I wore many of my titles like crowns of gold, built castles from praises, stories retold. Yet when the crowd faded, silence grew near. I whispered, without all this, who am I here? The role is a garment woven and torn, the soul is eternal, present since born. Success is a chapter, not the whole book. Turn inward, discover, take a deeper look. All that I am, I'm not labels, nor ladders I climb, not just the work nor the measures of time. I am the heart, the breath, and the flame. Beyond every title, I still have a name.

SPEAKER_00:

My God, Algie Mosley, people, he just wrote that's powerful. And my takeaway from it is just what we're talking about the identity crisis. I feel that we trip ourselves up, that defines us in how we navigate our lives, right? So if you're in this senior management role, you have to show up a certain way. And sometimes that compromises our core values, and we're willing to compromise that because of the title. And your poem reminds me that it ain't about that because success is only one chapter of the bigger picture. And how many chapters of success can you accumulate in the whole book? And the book is our life, the book is our life, and as we go through the duration of the book, how many of those chapters can we make a success? And not being solely reliant on the title to drive you as the label of being success. That's correct. And that's what I took from that poem, my my friend.

SPEAKER_04:

It's a really unique time, it's right around my framework, isn't it? It's who I was when I came out of the arena. You know, I went into the arena, I was who I was. I was one chapter, all many combined together. Yep. And matter of fact, in some ways, I thought I was all at the bag of chips. Yeah. But when I got broken, that's when the real lesson began.

SPEAKER_00:

The other thing, too, though, is man, I'm so thankful, first of all, for you and Tisha participating because there's some soul searching that happens in there. It's some peeling the layers of the onion back a little bit. And one of the first documents that we talk about, what's your real truth, right? And some of us is walking around flawed, and you come into the arena, there's no judgment. But sometimes you got to get to the core truth about the mask you're carrying. And we have so many, I have so many different tools that we didn't even experience all of them. I have so much stuff in in the playbook that you create. But yeah, man, I don't want to give too much away because you just got to experience it. But I created this framework, swag, the inner arena, because so many of us high achievers, we just stuck. We don't have that space to offload some of the baggage that we're carrying, and we don't know how because it's not taught in school, Algie. All the years of education that you had, where did you learn at the basic level to practice thinking positively?

SPEAKER_04:

You know, Mo, it took many, many books, self-help books for me. It was ultimately reading and hearing Les Brown, motivational speaker, that inspired me to continue not only my reading, but being an example of what I read. That's my be it forward concept, right? But nowhere in my education at UC Davis, Sacramento City College, even in my daycare, and I'll go even further, even in my many years of management, nowhere, and I wish, as I look back on those experiences in my life, I had gone through the arena a long time ago. I wish I would have came out of the arena at birth and equipped with all of these tools in which to deal with life, combat life that is ultimately gonna be those chapters added up called my life. Exactly, man. Exactly.

SPEAKER_00:

And then you're not taught like how to address or tame that punk ass inner critic because it's camouflaged as your voice in your head for trying to protect you, but it's really keeping you small. Here's what I mean. People don't understand this. Because you're conditioned, we're conditioned to believe that voice. That's correct. Because it sounds like me, it sounds like I'm giving myself good advice, right? And I'm gonna I'm gonna touch on it at the simplest level. You're in the meeting and you have a question, and your thought tells you, man, that's a dumb question. Don't ask that question, they're gonna look at you funny or they're gonna think you stupid, whatever the narrative is. But in that moment, the thought don't ask the question because certain judgment after the because at the lowest level, that's the inner critic. The inner critic. You don't ask the question, everybody else is asking their questions, right? Then you get off the call, then you think, damn, I should have asked that question. Now I gotta go seek out this information to get the answer. When you could have asked it the question in the meeting, but the inner critic talked you out of it, and it shows up in so many different forms, man. Public speaking, you got this presentation, you're this expert. That's right. You've been doing this for years. That's right. Don't nobody have the knowledge that you have about this content that you have to present on, but you're afraid because the inner critic is telling you you sound stupid on stage. People are gonna ask a question that you may not have the answer to. What are you gonna do then? So then you over-prepare. And then because you're over-preparing, you're becoming stressed. And the inner critic camouflage it as you gotta work harder so that you don't make a mistake while you're presenting. But you're the expert, you've been doing this for 20-some years, 10 years. Nobody knows this like you, but you're just got this anxiety. That's the inner critic, that's that punk ass inner critic. And then you come into the arena, I taught you how to address it. Uh yes, and it goes back to this whole frame of the conversation that we're talking about, identity crisis, right? And I'm gonna ask you this, Algie, without knowing what you know about the inner arena, things like that, before that, how do you what was your thought process and how to address identity crisis if it came up for you?

SPEAKER_04:

My thought process, identity crisis, helped me understand that my form of thought processes was a beautiful one, and that when times of trouble and conflict comes, I automatically gravitate not to a level of level two, which is chaos and blame, and oh, it was her problem, it was you. No, if you had a sentinel on time, my whole thought process is I'm gravitating to solution to rid myself of the mental pollution. So that's what the arena taught me was and not just how to get through those and how sometimes you just gotta be still because it's not about you, right? And being able to understand, like I'm gonna use an example in my earlier management experience, right? Um, I used to seek validation. Am I worthy enough to be on the management team? What did the group say about me? What do they think about me? That was an identity crisis. If I know who I am, I don't need to ask anyone for validation of who I am and what I am, and that's more what the arena helped me validate. Let me use an analogy, understanding you're a goose, right? And you came in and everybody loves you, and you have all these titles and these accolades and ideas and perceptions, but you're able to produce these products and everybody get captivated on the products that you produce, which we'll call the golden egg. And after a while, everybody's so captivated on the products they forget the goose that laid that golden egg. And the value transforms from the goose to the egg. But it is up to the goose to realize its true value, right? Not what it produced, it's who it is. So the value is not the egg because people are greater than what they produce.

SPEAKER_00:

That goes back to what you said about the titles. Yes, yes. I need to be XYZ because you know that I need to look, that would make me be successful if I had this title, if I did this in this role, then this is how I would be perceived. So that's success.

SPEAKER_04:

And then identity crisis happened. Let's say you get all the success and you get all the titles and you have all the degrees, but then one day you get lost in the hood. What good is all those degrees and all that success if you don't have a heart?

SPEAKER_00:

Exactly. So remind us what's be it forward.

SPEAKER_04:

Be it forward is the concept of understanding, just like what we were talking about the goose versus the egg. Understanding you are the goose and you're more valuable than the egg. And once you understand that concept, then you're able to be it forward. I like that.

SPEAKER_00:

At the smallest level, going into the arena, you came out with swag. And with swag, you did it for it.

SPEAKER_04:

I went into the arena as a chicken and I came out as an eagle.

SPEAKER_03:

I realized I could go beyond the barnyard now. I can fly. My destiny and my chapters are gonna look different.

SPEAKER_00:

Oh my goodness, you're cracking me up, brother. You're cracking me up. On a serious note, man, it's all about really bringing value to people, man. Because what I teach, even with the swag concept at the basic level, and that's something that's really easy to remember. Self-awareness, why power, aligned action, and grit. When you don't have swag, right? There's some sort of judgment present. That means you're feeling afraid of something, you are doubtful, you're triggered, and you're angry, maybe you're a little depressed, you're sad, all of these types of negative emotions. In that moment, there's no swag. You're just because you're distracted, right? You're distracted away from your core values, right? Whatever those values are, they're off alignment, right? They're off alignment. You don't feel your best, judgment is present, so there's no swag. And the simple concept, when you understand self-awareness, why power, aligned action, and grit, and understand how to apply it for yourself at the simple, simplest level, and you have swag, you get out of that funk almost immediately. And when I'm teaching, you don't get this in schools, you just don't. You don't get it in most training. They don't, they wasn't getting this in my place of employment until I start putting awareness on this, right? Wow, oh my god, this is amazing. I've never heard of anything like this. Oh seriously, seriously, bro. I'm not over-exaggerating, man, because Algie, man, and I think this is why we get along so well. This is why you're my brother, man. I have this deep passion for this stuff, man. I really do. And the people who like really trust the content of what I'm sharing and teaching, brother, they prosper, man. They prosper. And you had an opportunity to pop in on a Saturday, right? And we did this all day, and you'd say, man, this is already gonna change me. And we just scratched the surface of the material that I had in there. And I was like, man, most of this stuff, man, you need to work on this on your own. And then we'll come back to the arena and we'll talk more about it and things like that, because that's the locker room. That's the locker room, right? It's like in sports, man. You train, you work out, and you you prepping for the game, right? You go to the game, you do all this stuff, right? And then you go to the locker room. And the coach is in the locker room and is giving you your pep talk and all of that stuff. And let's talk about what's going wrong, what went wrong, how do we make pivots? It's like at halftime, making halftime adjustments and things like that. And that's the concept that I brought for leadership. It doesn't matter, man. If you're a high achiever, a leader, a successful, aspiring mom that just want to be the best mom that you can be, you need a locker room too. That's right. That's right, that's right. I'm trying to tell you, man. I'm trying to tell you, you need a locker room. And it's just real talk. The punk ass inner critic right now, but people that's listening to this is probably trying to talk you out of investigating what this locker room is and what is this inner arena thing, because that's what he does. And I'm just, it's no pressure on my end, right? Because what I do is I help people create the power of choice. And whenever the inner critic is present, there is no power of choice. He's not giving you choice, he's keeping you from making choice choices.

SPEAKER_04:

That's right.

SPEAKER_00:

You know what I mean? And so I just laugh because I know because I've been there. I have inner critic too. I'm not above this. I'm not. I shared the story about how I dealt with an inner critic that morning or whatnot, but we all deal with it, man. I just really care about educating people around this. Man, I had a lot of valleys, man. I had a lot of valleys, I had a lot of sob story, a lot of why this keeps happening to me, a lot of victim moments. And that's right, no whole, but you know what? I rose. I rose. And now that I I I elevated myself, I just want to teach others.

SPEAKER_04:

That's well, I'll tell you, going to the inner arena before I was going in there, and you were talking all about this transformation, but it's gonna do all these things, and you got me kind of excited about this thing. But after going through it, brother, I wish my manager would go through it. I wish the company would pay for everybody to experience this. I just believe that if everybody goes through the arena, the world gets better, you know. As Tish talked about hanging out with you and your family when you were in Costa Rica and that and watching her just break down in tears. Emotional, you at its highest, because she had never ever felt that before in her life. And so it's imagine if you what you've done to your family and taking them in the arena, right? And now you're exposing the world. Hey, this is I have a dream, right? This is it, and you're equipping people to manifest their dreams, right? That's right, to know that they're more than a conqueror, and that's what that arena is. Who told you who you are? And then you come out of the arena and you say, I am, I am that's right, brother. And when you start saying, I am, as you were telling me earlier in our conversations, right? All of a sudden, I am, I am, and that inner critic that was telling me you're not manifesting, I am, I am, and just kept on I am. And then before I knew it, as I got home from work one day and I took off my name badge, it said, speaker, that I am was actually in full effect.

SPEAKER_00:

Take us back real quick because I think the audience should know about that, because that's a great identity check right now, right? Because of what you were telling yourself and what really was, and you had that moment when you saw the badge and it just lit up. So take us through that whole analogy of the story.

SPEAKER_04:

So many years I've always doubted myself as a speaker. I remember when I first moved here and uh I had an opportunity to go on stage and uh tell a joke, right? Uh-huh. I was just scared. I was scared to get up and speak in front of the public, right? And for a lot of my years, that's been a troubling thing for me, although I could do it in a little small setting with my teens and things like that. But that inner critic always told me I wasn't good enough. I was I couldn't speak, right? So for years I held that, right? And then one day, as I sp spoke at a friend of mine's little party where she took seven tries to pass the bar. And when I spoke afterwards, a little kid, uh probably about eight years old, came over next to me. And when you talk about out of the mouth of babes, right? And he pulled up my coat and I looked down and he says, You're a great speaker. Whoa, whoa. He spoke to that punk ass critic. Exactly. And but to me, he spoke truth at that moment, and then I started believing, you know, it's possible that I could speak publicly. And then I started thinking about whoa, I have spoken publicly before, but it didn't dawn on me. And then we started connecting. And I told you, hey, I want to be a public speaker, I want to get back into my coaching, I want to do these things. And lo and behold, as we were talking about it and I was speaking these things, I am right, and I am a great speaker, I am a great coach, and you reminded me of tools I used to utilize to get me through college, yeah, to get me through those trials. It was like iron sharpening iron, per se. And so through that, and then all of a sudden, my work, I had to go do this thing for my work, and they wanted me to talk about my job a little bit, and so I went there with my manager to talk about my job, and that's what we did. We talked to this audience who loved the conversation, and a lot of them came over and said, Hey, Algie, we heard you were over here. We just wanted to come by just to hear you, and uh it's like whoa, just to hear me, whoa, and like I said, it was like an awe. And when I got home and I was taking off my costume, my suit and my tie, and I took off the badge. That I didn't make the badge, they made the badges. I just didn't even look at it, I just put it on when I got there, and when I took it off, it said public speaker. Whoa, I'm actually doing this thing.

SPEAKER_00:

I'm actually inner critic. He had you like thinking that you're not a speaker. That's what Bro, thank you for sharing that. Seriously, thank you for sharing that because that's what I'm talking about. Think about it. There's so many people, and we all do it, but we're all on this idle pilot believing the narrative of what that punk ass energy critic is telling us. We believe it to be true, so we limit ourselves, and you walking around doubtful that you can you couldn't do that, and here you are doing it, and then a kid he says, You're you're an awesome speaker.

unknown:

What?

SPEAKER_00:

That's what I'm saying, bro. That's what I'm saying, man. I'm so excited that we're just connected and we're having these types of talks. It's good to be on the airlines talking about this stuff. Before we sign out, I just want to add, people may be thinking, Mo, okay, you talking all of this stuff. How do I get access to the inner arena? Just get you the swag cheat sheet. Okay. Start there. Baby steps. There's baby steps to this. Learn swag and how swag can apply to you. And I have a swag cheat sheet that I give away for free. All you have to do is go to the inner arena leadership.com. Inter arena leadership.com. And when you get there, you'll have access to my swag cheat sheet. There's information about the inner arena there. Don't get me wrong. But start with the swag. Yeah, baby steps, baby steps. See how that swag cheat sheet can apply to you in your day-to-day. Because when you do have swag, you have that swag too. Bro, any final thoughts you want to share before we jump out of here, man?

SPEAKER_04:

Well, I just think personally, when you have swag, somehow, you just feel a whole lot better. You feel you radiate energy. You are on a platform. You're not a one or two. You're on a four or five, and that's seven, which feels like heaven. So I personally thank you for allowing me the experience. And I only wish that everybody can get in that arena. And I know you said start with the swag sheet, but brother, I say jump into the water deep.

SPEAKER_00:

I I just want people to take baby stuff, man. That's all I'm saying. Just take some baby stuff. Just get your cheat sheet first. Understand what the swag stuff is.

SPEAKER_03:

You want them to get through the teenage stage so that way when they get to that adult, they say, I'm grown. That's right, man.

SPEAKER_00:

And when you get your swag back, you be it forward, right?

SPEAKER_04:

That's right. Being it forward is beyond your wallet. It's an opportunity, you know, where you can be it forward. Where I always tell people the ice doesn't argue with the water. It can. How can it? Because it knows who it is. Powerful. I appreciate you, brother. Likewise, my brother.

SPEAKER_00:

Thank you for joining me in this episode of Let's Think About It. Your time and attention are greatly appreciated. If you found value in today's discussion, I encourage you to subscribe on your favorite podcast platform. Remember, the journey of self-improvement is ongoing, and I'm here to support you every step of the way. Connect with me on social media for updates and insights. You can find me on Instagram and Facebook at Coach Mo Coaching or LinkedIn at Maurice Mabry. Or visit my website at MauriceMabry.com for exclusive content. Until next time, keep reflecting, keep growing, and most importantly, keep believing in yourself. Remember, the most effective way to do it is to do it. Together, we're making incredible strides toward a better and more empowered you. So thank you, and I'll see you in our next episode.