Let's Think About It Podcast
Welcome to the Let's Think About It Podcast with Morice (Coach Mo) Mabry! Are you ready to break free from fear, doubt, and uncertainty to unlock your true potential? Join Coach Mo on a transformative journey as we tackle the barriers hindering your personal growth. In each episode, we engage in insightful conversations with certified coaches, career professionals, and thriving entrepreneurs. Together, we uncover practical strategies to overcome self-imposed limitations and cultivate resilience. Gain clarity, boost confidence, and thrive in the face of uncertainty. Coach Mo, an Associate Certified Coach (ACC) accredited by the International Coaching Federation (ICF) and a published author, serves as your guide on this empowering quest for self-discovery and growth. Through mindfulness and mindset mastery, we empower you to navigate the inner critic and life's challenges to seize opportunities for success. Tune in to the Let's Think About It Podcast to equip yourself with the tools and inspiration needed to embrace uncertainty, conquer fear, tame the inner critic, and chart a course towards personal fulfillment. Start your journey to greatness today!
Let's Think About It Podcast
The Imposter Within: Cultivating Self-Awareness to Combat Imposter Syndrome
Ever felt like a fraud in your own life, despite all your achievements? You're not alone. 🚶♂️ Join me, Coach Mo, as we navigate the choppy waters of imposter syndrome together. ⛵️ With mindfulness as our compass, we're charting a course to stronger self-belief and the confidence to embrace our successes as our own. 🧭 This episode isn't just about sharing experiences; it's about equipping you with the strategies to confront those inner doubts head-on, affirm your potential, and steer clear of the negative thought patterns that can capsize your self-assurance. 🛶
I'll be your guide, revealing personal tactics and anecdotes that have helped many to plant their feet firmly on the deck of self-acceptance. 🌊 We'll tap into the power of positive affirmations to quell the stormy seas of hesitation and avoidance. 🌦 Expect to uncover the transformative impact of supportive conversations and the importance of surrounding yourself with positive influences that can help you hoist your sails toward professional growth. 🌱 So, set sail with us on this voyage of self-discovery – it's time to claim your rightful place at the helm of your life. ⚓️
Welcome to the let's Think About it podcast, where we embark on a journey of thoughtfulness and personal growth.
Speaker 1:I'm your host, coach Mo, and I'm here to guide you through thought-promoting discussions that will inspire you to unlock your full potential. In each episode, we'll explore a wide range of topics, from self-discovery and mindfulness to goal-setting and achieving success. Together, we'll challenge conventional thinking and dive deep into the realms of possibility. Whether you're looking to find clarity in your personal or professional life, or seeking strategies to overcome obstacles, this podcast is your go-to source for insightful conversations and practical advice. So find a comfortable spot, chill and let's embark on this journey of self-improvement together. Remember, the power of transformation lies within you, and together we'll uncover the tools and insights you need to make it happen. So let's dive in. Welcome to another episode of the let's Think About it podcast. I'm your host, coach Mo, and I'm excited to be here yet again. I'm going to start by asking have you had these thoughts? And I'm going to read 10 thoughts. Okay, here we go. I'm not qualified for this position. I got here by luck, not skill. Everyone else seems more competent than me. I'm afraid of being exposed as a fraud. I need to work harder to prove myself. I don't deserve recognition or praise, I'm just winging it. I can't show any weaknesses or vulnerability. I'm afraid of failure. I don't belong here. Think about that. And that's just an example of just a few thoughts. Okay, have you had those thoughts? And if you've had, and we all have no front on that but the real question is, when you have that thought or something similar, maybe something else comes up for you. But when you have that thought, does it linger? Does it linger Meaning? Does it continue in your mindset hours, days? How long does it last? And if it does, there's an imposter that's present. There's a representative of you present, an imposter, someone that's not your authentic self, who's coming up with these thoughts in your head, and it's coming sometimes as a voice, and it's an imposter. It's not the real you. It's not. It never is. What I'm going to do today is help create more awareness, more self-awareness and how you could get through that and, when that imposter shows up, help you create a strategy to be more intentional when this imposter shows up. So here's the thing we all have these thoughts. We really do. They come and they go all the time. Where it becomes a problem is when the thoughts linger. That's when the imposter is present. That's when that voice starts to take over and the negative emotional type feelings come along with that it does. Now check me out here.
Speaker 1:The first step in identifying if the imposter is present is understanding your feelings in that moment. I know you're not a Philly type person, I get it right. But if you're not, then what's the indicator to know when the imposter is present? So think about that, really, think about that. That's what this podcast is, by the way. Let's think about it. But think about that.
Speaker 1:When you're feeling worried, just think of the feeling of worried. Think of a feeling of doubt, uncertainty, disappointment, guilt. Typically the imposter is present because when you have those feelings, a thought might be I'm afraid of failure. To have a thought of being afraid of failure. You're not going to be excited about that. There's some sort of disappointment around that. So the first thing that you can do to dismiss this imposter is to know your state of being, of what that feeling is in that moment. That's the trigger. So when you feeling hesitant to make a decision, think about that. We all have to make decisions and sometimes it's a tough decision, right? And you're feeling afraid, worried. What's that thought. In that moment Is the imposter present?
Speaker 1:He is or she is, because you haven't made the decision, because you're worried, you're judging a particular outcome before the decision is even made and it's scary, right, the imposter is present, he's telling you or she's telling you it's not going to work out or, worst case scenario, you're going to look embarrassed, they're going to say this, they're going to do that, they're going to do that. Right, imposter is pleasant. So how about the moment? You feel nervous, worried, afraid that you utilize that as the trigger to take action, utilize it as the trigger to remind you this is the time not to be afraid, this is the time that I will be successful, this is the time I am knowledgeable and guess what? That's the first step in creating awareness to dismiss this imposter that's present, because that's the goal when it comes down to taking action, when it comes to making certain decisions, moving forward, whatever. The imposter has a tendency to show up in those times, because we typically don't know what that result is going to be and we're trying to project what that outcome is and we struggle with figuring out what that outcome potentially is going to be. So it becomes scary as hell because we may fail, and that's when an imposter becomes present. The more you linger, the stronger the imposter stays present. So having more awareness around what your feelings are is the key to moving past this imposter when it shows up.
Speaker 1:The other thing that you can do is mindfulness, and I've talked about this before. We are consumed from social media, the news, family members, friends, tv, newspaper, any outlet that we are aware of ads any of that negative, and we absorb it day in and day out into our consciousness. That's a fact. But what are you doing to offset that with positivity into your mindset? If you're not doing anything and just the bare minimum of just allowing things into your consciousness that are negative, guess what? It just becomes part of your being, and our family, our friends, contribute to that without even knowing right. Just certain comments as we're growing up as kids oh, that's never going to work. Oh, you can't do this, oh, that's too tough, oh, that's not possible. All of this, there's millions of things that comes into our consciousness daily. That's we can't this, we can't that, this right. That contributes towards the imposter when it shows up.
Speaker 1:And the mindfulness approach is creating more positivity into your consciousness, and there are so many ways that you can do that. And the first thing that comes to my mind with mindfulness is meditation. Meditation is the easiest form of mindfulness that we can do, that we have control over, and we think it's easy to assume that meditation is this 30-minute process that you have to go through of just clear silence and not being interrupted. Meditation is what you make meditation to be and how you define meditation to be what works for you to create the mindfulness you define meditation to be, what works for you to create the mindfulness. For me, the meditation is just breathing techniques, and I do this throughout the day, just pausing and taking deep breaths and reminding myself how great of a man I am all day, every day, throughout the day, just saying you know what, moe? You're awesome. Man, dude, you're killing it. Man, you are the best version of yourself. Man, moe, I'm so proud of you. Damn, you look good bro. I feel you All of that. That's my version of meditation and mindfulness for myself.
Speaker 1:And then what I also do is I journal, I write affirmations. I got a notebook that I filled up with affirmations. Remember when we were in elementary school. I'm old school, but I remember when I was in elementary school. You'll get in trouble, and the task was to go write something on the board. I will not blah, blah, blah, right, I will not this, I will not that, whatever. But think about that. You did that, we did that when we got in trouble, to put into our consciousness that we will not do this again, and it becomes a reminder subconsciously.
Speaker 1:I take the approach of writing that in an affirmation standpoint I am great, I am prosperity, I am successful, I am brilliant, I am amazing, I am an amazing husband, I am an amazing father, I am an amazing son, I am an amazing brother, I am happy, I am joy, I am love, I am awesomeness, I'm happy, I am joy, I am love, I am awesomeness. I'm intentionally putting positive affirmations into my mindset. This is what happens when I do that and I'm intentional about doing that. See, the imposter shows up saying oh no, this isn't going to work If you do this. People may think that that's what happens. I experienced it too. But because I'm intentional about the positive affirmations that I put in my mindset, right, that imposter doesn't linger, it becomes a mere thought that just passes and it comes in and it goes right out and I keep it moving.
Speaker 1:I have a decision to make and in the moment that I have to make a decision, a nervousness feeling comes up. That's the trigger to tell me that I need to make a decision. Okay, and then I just make the decision because I have the awareness in that moment that the imposter is trying to be present to dissuade me from making a decision. See, and how he dissuades me from making a decision is to distract me of the nervousness of what I'm feeling. And now my energy and my attention is focused on the nervousness of what I'm feeling. And in that moment, being focused on the nervousness, I'm not productive, I'm not making a decision because my energy and my attention is all geared towards the nervousness, the fear, the doubt and in that moment, with my attention focused on that, avoidance happened, avoidance, and when I avoid it, I think it goes away because it feels normal. I waited for that nervousness to go away, but at the end of the day, a decision was never made because it was avoided, and the imposter shows up again at a later time, later date.
Speaker 1:Allah, you're in this cycle that continues to repeat itself because the imposter hasn't been addressed. It never has, and when that imposter isn't addressed, it keeps resurfacing in different forms. That's why, when people are in these positions at work I hate my job, I hate this, I hate that but they never address the imposter and they avoid it. And the biggest avoidance of it is to find another job without addressing it. That's what a lot of people do. I hate my manager, I don't like this person. You know what? I'm just going to find another job. You can do that.
Speaker 1:But in the relations with your supervisor maybe you never addressed the real root of the situation, because you were afraid to have a difficult conversation with your supervisor, because the imposter was present, convincing you that if you speak up for yourself, it's not going to go well, you're going to be perceived a different way, a certain way, and guess what? You bust your ass to find another job. All is good. So you think. All is good. So you think, because the imposter resurfaces in your new job in a different form, forcing another reality that you have to deal with it. And it looks exactly the same, but a different situation. It's in a different person, it's in a different form, and that imposter is back present because it's never been addressed. It's always been avoided. So think about it. Think about that, whatever goal you have and why you haven't achieved that goal, is the imposter really present that's preventing you from achieving that goal? Think about that. Have you addressed the imposter that's limiting you?
Speaker 1:Okay, the other way to approach this imposter acknowledgement, the easiest thing you can do, and here's what that looked like I'm afraid that I might fail. You know what. It's okay to feel that I'm afraid to fail. Anybody would feel afraid to fail in a situation. It's okay to have the feelings that I have about failing, but you know what I'm not going to fail. Anybody would feel afraid to fail in a situation. It's okay to have the feelings that I have about failing, but you know what I'm not going to fail. See, in that thought process, I acknowledge that I don't want to fail. No one wants to fail. So I just acknowledged it. Now I make a decision to move forward, to take action. You see the difference. You can be afraid to fail, right, that's normal, we all have those feelings.
Speaker 1:You can be afraid to fail, but avoiding the situation isn't going to help you move the needle and getting rid of the imposter. The avoidance part is what creates it to resurface, the imposter to resurface. So just acknowledge, acknowledge it. Yeah, it's a scary moment. Yeah, I don't do well with change, but it's going to be different this time. Here's what I'm going to do and I just take action, or you take action.
Speaker 1:Another thing that you can do to help offset this imposter is talk to someone you trust, someone with positivity. Don't talk to someone that's negative, because they'll reinforce the imposter. You got to find someone in your world that gives you positivity, that reinforces the goodness and the value that you bring. See, when you have that, that becomes encouraging for you to take action and move forward. Having a coach your boy here, coach Mo, not just a coach, though, a mentor, a counselor, a really good friend who's very successful, optimistic that's what you need in your circle of influence so that you can get this out of your head.
Speaker 1:The imposter is in our head and as long as we continue to carry the imposter in our head, we begin to believe the story to be true. We begin to believe that whatever the is saying is true, and when you have that false belief of this imposter in your head, you're limited. That's why you begin to avoid, that's why fear comes up, that's why you become disappointed. All of these things you forget. It's easier to forget about affirmations and things like that, because the imposter is very present. But when you have someone to talk to and that's the value of what I love doing around coaching is helping people to create self-awareness. It's not that I'm telling people what to do, I'm asking these questions. And as they're answering these questions for themselves most people they start realizing like damn, I've been in my own head, in my own head, I didn't even realize that and I was believing this shit that the imposter was telling me to be true.
Speaker 1:And then, guess what, you dismiss it and you take action and all is good. That's how it typically works, just like you have, let's just say, a presentation to do. You're nervous and all of this stuff, right, you're afraid. Oh, this is scary. You have all of this. The imposter is pleasant, he's pleasant, right. But then the moment that the action of presenting and people are into your presentation, they said this is great, great job, blah, blah, blah. But the moment you started presenting, guess what? The imposter took a backseat. It's the action, the action, right, and you're not in your head anymore while you're speaking and presenting. That's the key.
Speaker 1:So talking to someone gets you out of your own head, but it has to be someone that you respect, someone that you trust, someone that provides optimism, someone that's caring, provides optimism, someone that's caring, that's not going to fill your head with their fears. When you can find that person, that's what you need, and then you can even be intentional about that. You can tell the person, you can be intentional, tell the person hey, there's going to be some times I want to talk to you. I don't need you to give me any advice, I just need you to listen. And if you can listen, that allows me to just talk some things out of my mind, and doing that in itself can help diminish the imposter from reoccurring in that circumstance. And if I need you, if I need advice, I will ask for you to give me advice. If I need advice, I will ask for you to give me advice. You can set those ground rules with the relationship of the person that you choose to talk to.
Speaker 1:That's being intentional, because we do have people in our lives who love to give advice. They want to be helpful, but sometimes their helpfulness can be putting their fears into you, because they feel that if you try something, you may fail, because they tried it and they failed and through their experience, you will have the same experience. That's not helpful. That's not helpful, right? And you want someone that's there to really just listen, empathically listen, without advice, and gives you the space to talk through what's in your head. And as you're talking through what's in your head, you'll figure it out. You will, you will. You just got to get it out of your head. That's the value of doing that, okay?
Speaker 1:So self-awareness, mindfulness, acknowledgement and speaking with a friend, a loved one, coach, getting it out are four areas of things that you can do to limit the imposter for continuously showing up and dissuading you in certain circumstances. If you do that, if you do that, you'll be good. You'll start moving and moving the needle in the right direction. Now, I'm not saying it's going to be easy, I didn't say that. But with anything that we do, it's repetition. Remember that. It's repetition. You got to practice and it's always going to be easiest to do nothing. It is. It's going to be easier, easiest to do nothing.
Speaker 1:You're listening to this right now. You're like, yeah, mo, you're right man, yeah, I'm going to try this. Man, halfway through the day, the imposter is going to show up. Man, we don't got time to do what Mo was talking about and you do nothing. And guess what? You start making excuses oh, I'll get to doing it, I'll get to this mindfulness thing, I'll get to the self-awareness thing. You're putting it off, you're putting it off, and the more you put it off, the stronger the imposter becomes. That's just how it works, and you don't even realize that's what's happening until after the fact that you've been dwelling on a situation around, like saying I don't belong here, and you've been dwelling on it for an hour and you're like, damn, this is what Mo was talking about. An hour later.
Speaker 1:But that's how all of this works, man. That's how all of it works, and you know what I'm saying. You all know what I'm saying. It's just like when you go to a training and you hear something really good yeah, this is good, this is great. You're taking notes, you're doing all of this stuff right? Yeah, I'm going to incorporate that.
Speaker 1:And training, you do nothing, you forget about it, because it's easiest to do nothing. It's easiest to stay where you are and autopilot, allowing the imposter to rule your being. That's the easiest thing you can do. So I challenge you I really do. I challenge you right now to create more self-awareness for yourself, Meaning, like I said, have awareness of what those feelings are when you feel the trigger of being afraid, disappointed.
Speaker 1:Any of that's the trigger to take action, that's the trigger to let you know that the imposter is present. So start with that. Talk to a friend colleague, establish some sort of relationship where you have the space to talk through these things. Do that, okay. Acknowledgement it's okay to acknowledge that you're afraid. In that acknowledgement, decide to take action and move forward. It will go away. It will go away and it helps limit the imposter from being present. And then, finally, mindfulness okay, just gratitude. Have some gratitude. Create some acts for yourself where you're incorporating more gratitude and you do those things, you'll keep that imposter at bay and you'll just naturally start feeling better about yourself all day, every day.
Speaker 1:I appreciate you guys. Thank you, peace. Thank you for joining me in this episode of let's Think About it. Your time and attention are greatly appreciated. If you found value in today's discussion, I encourage you to subscribe on your favorite podcast platform. Remember, the journey of self-improvement is ongoing and I'm here to support you every step of the way. Connect with me on social media for updates and insights. You can find me on Instagram and Facebook at Coach, mo Coaching or LinkedIn at Maurice Mabry, or visit my website at mauricemabrycom for exclusive content. Until next time, keep reflecting, keep growing and, most importantly, keep believing in yourself. Remember, the most effective way to do it is to do it together. We're making incredible strides toward a better and more empowered you. So thank you, and I'll see you in our next episode.